Ramonita Salaysay, a midwife at a government hospital in Cotabato City went up the hillside to sprinkle rose petals on the spot where she found her husband, Napoleon, publisher of ClearView Gazette, a day after the massacre.

Myrna Reblando asked where her husband, Manila Bulletin reporter Alejandro “Bong” Reblando,  was killed and offered flowers earlier plucked from the roadside.  It was her first time to visit the site.

Earlier in the morning at the press conference in Koronadal City, Reblando, president of the organization of media victims’ families, Justice NOW!, said she would no longer cry.

“Hindi na ako iiyak dahil ang kailangan ngayon hindi luha kundi tapang,” (I will no longer cry because what is needed now is not tears but courage), Reblando said.

Reblando asked if there were seven candles – presumably for her children -- but finding none, got a twig from a nearby bush and with a stone on her right hand and the twig on her left, pounded on the twig to flag the  spot where her husband was found dead inside one of the vehicles.

As she pushed the twig down with the stone, she started sobbing and stopped her pounding. “She stood up and mumbled “Grabe kaayo sila, grabe sila” (They’re too much, they’re too much), apparently referring to the killers.

Much later, she would scream about the greed for power and money.

For Reynafe Momay-Castillo, daughter of Reynaldo “Bebot” Momay,  photographer of Midland Review in Tacurong City, it was not her first time to visit the site. She had been there several times to look for her father’s remains but they only found his dentures.

She  broke down as she looked around her - the other families had buried their dead while they are still looking for theirs.

Erlyn Umpad  had some time to grieve by herself until people started going up to where she was – the general area where McDelbert Arriola, was found – and some people started focusing their cameras on her.

Erlyn had just given birth to their son Japhet,  when Macmac, whom she was supposed to marry a few weeks later, was killed.

Juliet Evardo, mother of UNTV’s Jolito Evardo, said she thought of taking photographs at the site but realized she couldn’t when she reached the place. “Makaiyak ka pala talaga” (you will really cry), she said, as she tried to imagine her son’s last moments.  

On Sunday morning, Juliet said she would have wanted to scream out there in the massacre site but was ashamed.

“Gusto ko sanang sumigaw” (I would have wanted to scream), she said, “pero nahiya ako kay maraming tao” (but I was ashamed because there were so many people). She said she was afraid that if she did scream, photographers would run towards her and shove their cameras, microphones and recorders into her face.

“Ayoko non” (I don’t like that).

Erlyn, Juliet and Catherine Nunez, mother of UNTV’s Victor Nunez, had to travel to General Santos City, where their loved ones are buried along with the other GenSan-based journalists, to visit them at the Forest Lake memorial park.

The twelve GenSan-based reporters were buried in a family plot at the memorial park.  

The launching of their organization, Justice NOW! last Saturday, was an important moment for the media victims’ families who, the weekend before, gathered for the first of a series of psychosocial interventions initiated by the NUJP in Alabel, Sarangani.

Relatives have been drawing strength from each other and from the network of support groups helping them.

They have been sharing ways of coping with grief. One of them even composed a song to the tune of  Joey Albert’s “Iisa pa lamang.”

The author who prefers not to be named for now, apologizes for using Albert’s music for the lyrics, the start of which is: “Sa dinami-dami ng inyong pinatay, ngayon kayo’y nakarma at kayo’y nakukulong na/Iisa pa lamang ang aming inasam-asam/mahatulan ng bitay ang lahat nang pumatay”  (You have killed so many people/Now you are in prison/our only wish is/that all those who killed will be sentenced to death).

At least 58 persons were killed in the Nov. 23 massacre but only 57 bodies were recovered. Momay’s remains are stil unaccounted for but for his dentures.

A total of 57 bodies were retrieved from the massacre site in Sitio Masalay, Barangay Salman, Ampatuan, Maguindanao, 35 of them buried in three gravesites.

Two months after the November 23 massacre, only the principal suspect, then Datu Unsay mayor Andal Ampatuan “Unsay” Jr., has been tried for murder.

Lawyer Carlos Isagani Zarate of the Union of Peoples’ Lawyers in Mindanao (UPLM) and convenor of  the Alliance Against Impunity, said the rest of the Ampatuans, “influential and known for being powerful allies of the Arroyo administration,” are charged with rebellion, which he fears could be easily be dismissed.

“Worse is that the suspects might be exonerated. That is a possibility that we, especially the families of the victims, are so wary about now. We have been witnesses to how this government allowed the culture of impunity to flourish in our midst and we cannot allow that to happen anymore. The blood of all the victims of the Ampatuan Massacre must end this culture of impunity now,” Zarate said in an earlier press statement.

The group pointed out that under the Arroyo administration, the impunity of military death squads, private armies and warlordism has taken away about 350 lives in Mindanao alone.
(Carolyn O. Arguillas/MindaNews)

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